Category Archives: Columnist

Weekend Tarot Reading — Sunday, Oct. 11, 2015

By Sarah Taylor

Equipped with what he has taken a stand to protect, the Knight (King) of Cups now turns and walks down the open road, towards the mountains in the distance and the next phase of his journey.

knight_cups_three_wands_four_wands_rohrig_sm

Knight of Cups, Three of Wands, Four of Wands from The Röhrig Tarot deck, created by Carl-W. Röhrig. Click on the image for a larger version.

When I write of the Knight, I’m not writing so much about a man as of the inner masculine that we all have. Sure, he may show up in your life as a man — whether you, or someone else — but even if he does, it’s still likely that he’s reflecting what exists in you already.

The Knight in his highest expression is the mature, individuated masculine. He is outwardly focused, active, directing his attention with laser-like precision. As the Knight of Cups, his focus takes him into the realm of the heart — what bubbles up out of the unconscious as emotions, those indicators of the presence of something that may not otherwise be identifiable.

The Knight of Cups knows both sides of love. The rose on his cheek, and the stem of thorns that extends down his neck, represent both the beauty and the pain that are experienced when one opens their heart. I like to think that the plumes extending up and away from the figure in the Three of Wands are the fragile yet exquisite and indisputable evidence of the Knight’s capacity to feel. Yes, he is alone, and yet still they emanate from him, a body of light that illuminates his path in darker moments, and calls others to him with their vulnerable beauty.

This is “Virtue”: the steadfast holding to what he knows, even in the most unlikely and isolated of circumstances. This isn’t virtue that asks for recognition. It exists simply for its own sake. The Knight knows what he is for: his “ability to give,” a “family of one’s choice,” “SPIRITUAL RELATIONS.”

In a hardened world where so many of us are taught to ‘man up’, and to hide our hearts under armour, the Knight is distinctly unfashionable — walking his path, witnessed only by the three wands that act as a gateway to what lies on the horizon. Oh, and witnessed by you, too. Your presence in the face of these cards is as important as the cards themselves. There would be no reading without either, no meaning without both them and you.

You and the cards, in this moment, are one.

The message that the Knight’s presence this week brings: your path may sometimes feel like a lonely one, but only if you close your vision off from the magic of another realm — one that is far more subtle, but which reveals the feathers of your angel wings. In some way, you have demonstrated courage beyond words by holding to your heart-felt convictions. You may have chosen to turn your back on what no longer makes sense to you any more. It didn’t make sense because it ran counter to your values. Now you carry your values with you, openly, unafraid of embodying and living them out.

Those mountains move steadily towards you as you make your way. Soon, a gateway will reveal itself to you, where you step out and away from what you have known for a long time, and into an invitation with the unknown. You are being called — by what, and whom, you’re not yet sure. One thing’s for sure, though. They can see you coming. You are announcing your approach with that wide-open heart.

No apologies for what you feel. Not anymore. When that threshold presents itself between the old and the new, you’ll know what to do.

Astrology/Elemental correspondences: Knight of Cups (the fiery aspect of water), Three of Wands (Sun in Aries), Four of Wands (Venus in Aries)

If you want to experiment with tarot cards and don’t have any, we provide a free tarot spread generator using the Celtic Wings spread, which is based on the traditional Celtic Cross spread. This article explains how to use the spread.

Listening to the Inner and the Outer

By Amanda Moreno

Lately, my soul has been longing for quiet. I consider myself to be a city girl in so many ways and for so many reasons, but the fact of the matter is that cities are loud. For someone who is growing into her sensitivities, the constant sounds of planes, trains, automobiles, humans, dogs and so on can become abrasive, even maddening.

Photo by graywacke/A Landing a Day

Photo by graywacke/A Landing a Day

I often imagine living in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but the noise of birds, winds and water to accompany me.

In the middle of a two-week trip to the East Coast, I have found myself unexpectedly spending some time in Brooklyn and New York City. At first I was anxious about it. There’s so much to do, so many decisions to be made and so much humanity to navigate in the city. On the heels of five days in a tiny town where I was helping souls to navigate past-life memories and the afterlife, I wasn’t sure coming to the city was the right decision, as I usually need quiet integration time.

Today, however, I found myself wandering through the city quite mindlessly and enjoying the hell out of it. Getting on trains, taking them uptown, then downtown, and leaning into the sea of humanity that is this big, beautiful city. I found myself asking the people in each establishment I visited where to go next and then following the routes they laid out. I noticed the feeling of being completely alone and yet entirely engulfed in a complex web of intertwining realities and dreams.

I experienced an interesting combination of feeling completely free and yet totally bound up in the rhythms of the city. New York City truly is a dimension all its own. Everyone is a stranger, and yet the awareness is there — everyone has a story and is carrying around so much under the surface.

At the training, I was honored to witness the incredible bravery of the 12 students as they plunged into some of their deepest traumas and compulsions in order to embrace the opportunity to heal. Looking around the opening circle on the first day, everyone seemed bright and cheery with an undertone of anxiety and fear. Then, as their stories began to come out, I remembered — people seeking deep soul work very rarely tell stories of ordinary lives. The places we can go to hear these stories, and the places they can go to tell these stories, are very limited.

The power of storytelling is quite profound. Sitting in silence and listening as the students told their stories in the circle, or even participating in shared storytelling around the dinner table, I was taken by the awareness of a simple truth that is so obvious and yet understated: you really can’t tell what someone is carrying around just by looking at them. You often can’t even tell by spending a little bit of time with them. I was also taken by the knowledge that we are so very lucky to have the container of the training to experience that opening and witnessing.

I met someone at the training who came over from Australia. We launched into an intense, personal story-telling conversation on the first night that lasted a few hours. During the course of the conversation she told me that she knows of 12 men between the ages of 19-25 who have committed suicide in the past few years in her hometown. I was shocked to hear the number, and shocked to learn that the Australian government apparently has a rule that suicide stories can’t be covered in the news.

We talked a bit about her thoughts as to why these boys had chosen to end their lives. She spoke of their isolation, or a lack of meaning, and we later related it to the lack of outlets for witnessing and storytelling and the alienation of the modern world. Surely each of them had their own story and own complex reasons for doing what they did, but still — there is a pervasive loneliness attached to being in the world today.

Context is everything. We don’t know the experiences people are carrying around that have led them to be who they are or to behave how they are behaving. As this Mercury retrograde period comes to a close and we head into a Libra Moon cycle, I’m called to reflect on how often I tend to forget this simple truth.

I’m also called to remind myself about the importance of authentic interactions — with an eye on what my intuition is telling me about the interaction, at the same time as I make a point of listening to what the other is saying and holding space for their story to come forward. Sometimes that balance is hard to find, as it can be when I am feeling over-stimulated or overwhelmed.

That is part of my own story, however. And it is up to me own that and do what I need to do to decompress and come back into myself. I do so with a blessed recognition that there are so many other people out there right now aiming to work through their hurts and pains, and embracing joy and love in spite of — or because of — their own complex and rich stories.

​Learning The Dance

by Judith Gayle

After three months of Saturn dinking around in the last degrees of Scorpio, the Lord of Karma is racing through Sagittarius, fanning fires, taking necessary twists and turns and delivering the logical consequences of our actions. Case in point? Just when you thought the torpor of the American political process couldn’t get worse, it did.

271+Judith_Gayle

All the anxiety over the government going unfunded again — the previous shutdown of this decade costing multi-billions in lost revenue — has fallen back to sheer amazement over the train wreck that is the House of Representatives.

I would have said leadership in the House, but a) there isn’t any, and b) it isn’t the leaders that are the current challenge. When John Boehner threw in the towel, no longer willing to try to bring his fractured party members together, he made plain his dilemma: the fringe of his membership had gone delusional, born in the cradle of FOX News paranoia and dedicated to achieving things they couldn’t possibly deliver without damaging the nation along with their party’s brand.

John called them ‘false prophets,’ which accurately captures the religious zealotry with which they’ve pursued that end. This is the same internal fracture that has resulted in the current crew of Republican presidential candidates, all but one or two of them unsuitable for national leadership.

Boehner had trusted the Republicans down the line to pick up the slack. Pubs are known for their ability to maintain a stable of likely prospects, groomed, well-financed and able to step up when it’s their turn at the gate. But that tradition has broken down since our Dubby was handed the presidency by errant Supremes. And that was before the Bagger movement fractured party priorities, and prior to the advent of the radical and unyielding Freedom Caucus.

The House Freedom Caucus is composed of the hard-core zealots who fly in the face of compromise of any sort, blaming Establishment politicians like Boehner for making any attempt to govern. They did not come to Washington to keep government running, they came to kill the beast — and they’ll take down anyone who gets in their way. While the Caucus itself is small, it carries a big stick: primary challenge. This has turned out to be a surprisingly effective tool to keep even old-timers like John McCain and Lindsey Graham in line with radical goals.

Boehner’s presumptive replacement, Kevin McCarthy, stumbled badly when he admitted that the Benghazi investigations had been successful in lowering Hillary’s popularity numbers, creating accusations of excessive and expensive ‘gotcha’ politics from the left and of sheer political ineptitude on the right. It’s also worth noting that rumors of sexual mischief on McCarthy’s part poisoned the water with the Caucus, who issue regular purity tests to their colleagues. Given all that, it’s no surprise McCarthy decided to pass, declaring the Baggers “ungovernable.”

The last time we had such a defection upon resignation of a speaker, we got House Speaker Tom DeLay, a bug exterminator from Texas who professed to know the mind of Gawd Almighty and George W. Bush, and served both faithfully in attempting to dismantle what was left of the common good established as The Great Society. His blanket refusal to consider any concerns of the minority party defined a period when the Republican machine simply rolled over anything in its path, paving the way toward the morass we find ourselves in today.

Since then, we have made little progress toward restoring economic equity to the public or mending our tattered social programs, and the Freedom Caucus has plans to make that even more painful for us all. Some say this is that place where the fabric rips beyond mending, where the Republican party becomes so regressive that the average American can no longer trust them to deliver on their behalf, and perhaps it is so. It’s difficult to see how they find common cause with those who want government to run efficiently — or run at all, at this point.

Anyone can become House leader; it does not require congressional membership. Some have suggested Mitt Romney could fill Boehner’s shoes. Some have said why not tap outgoing retirees to take the job, short-term, since they wouldn’t be forced to pay the price later (being primaried and replaced by someone farther to their right.) Insiders are begging Paul Ryan to step in, although Ryan has made it clear that he prefers digging into the complex minutia of the tax code to riding herd on Baggers — and this despite a loud and well-orchestrated plea from Establishment conservatives, terrified of any other outcome. Indeed, the few adults in the conservative party who see governance as an actual process, rather than a scourge on society, are beside themselves.

Nobody wants the job of House speaker, or almost nobody. You will probably not be surprised to discover that Newt Gingrich volunteered to step in for the good of the party and nation. And news today indicates that right-wing Pub enforcer Darrel Issa is considering the prospect of running to herd zealots, which isn’t much of a stretch since Darrel has spent a lifetime — much as has FOX’s Roger Ailes — creating them.

Issa has a long and checkered past, the kind that earned him a place on the CREW (Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington) list of most-corrupt politicians even before he hit the tragedy in Benghazi like an ill wind. As Charmian of the Committee on Oversight and Government Reform, his select committee witch hunt of AG Holder’s failed Fast and Furious weapons experiment — while coming to little except expense and wasted time — earned him a favored place among the radicals, but few friends in Establishment politics. His tireless vendetta against all things Obama, as well as the IRS, sweetens the deal on the far-right. Interestingly, Issa was replaced on Oversight by none other than Jason Chaffetz, the ideologue who was determined to go up against McCarthy’s bid for speaker. Darrel’s been looking for a better fit since, and — always an opportunist — he seems to think he’s found one.

Yes, as a politician, Issa is dangerous. As speaker, that would be an understatement: Darrel siding with the radicals to bring the “real fiscal reform they’ve been denied by the K Street, if you will, influence.” Read that: government shutdown. But no matter who takes this position, this is the Republican Party’s moment of implosion. It’s not going to get better from here.

This kind of musical chairs is just so much internal busy-ness to those who consider Establishment politics a waste of time and energy, but it takes on a different gravitas when you consider how far up the leadership pecking order House Speaker actually is. Put plainly, as a piece over at PoliticusUSA was titled, “A Tea Party Fascist Will Be Second In Line To the Presidency By Halloween.” Perhaps this is worth our attention after all!

As of now, nobody knows how this situation will shake out. But it seems part of our explosive astrology, this fine mess coming right on time, predicted and expected and, some would say, part of the purge that is separating the gold from the dross on the evolutionary scale, tearing the blinders off all but the deliberately ignorant and fearful. Politics is a mirror — an overview — of the dysfunctional relationship dynamics that play out in our private lives, from our boardrooms to our bedrooms. We’re getting a very well-deserved look at ourselves, and it ain’t pretty.

Perhaps this is the part where realization comes flooding in, where we face ourselves and grow up a little. Perhaps we can get real, surrender our hubris and arrogance and dance where karma leads us. Karma, a.k.a. that long, slow, earned and needed learning curve that sensitizes us to all we would project onto others. Karma, the often painful experience that must eventually lead to renewed understanding and synthesis.

Getting a grip on how perfectly positioned we are to get that glimpse of reality might provide us a breakthrough, if we’re willing. Truly, if the Phoenix is to rise out of these ashes, we need to acknowledge how much has burnt down. What is not sustainable, not ethical nor compassionate, must be released, and a new template for the future put in place. That is the work ahead.

As our Len tells us in his latest piece, we’re poised on “the grandmother of fresh starts” this coming Monday morning. If enough of us have learned the steps to the dance, aware of what must be left behind, consigned to the past — if enough of us are eager to create our future in harmlessness and collaboration, ethics restored, hearts open and mindfulness engaged — it will be an excellent beginning.

As we are released from old errors and unworkable decisions, progress is assured. And it’s comforting to remember that it’s only a small number of the planets population that is thwarting our desire to create a prosperous and peaceful world. As it was with each of us, those who aren’t ready for change are still learning the dance, held safely in the patient arms of the Lord of Karma, who knows all the steps.

First Comes Sex Talk With These Renegades of Couples Therapy

This week’s sex-and-relationships post comes from The New York Times, where you can read it in full (the first half is below). With Mercury having just stationed direct in Libra, conversations about relationships — including about the sex that may or may not be happening to the satisfaction of all involved — are a primary topic. — Amanda P.

By Amy Sohn

Is the classic postcoital question “Was it good for you, too?” outmoded?

A recent conference would indicate yes. Last month, the New York Center for Emotionally Focused Therapy held a symposium in New York called “Sex and Attachment: Coming Together.”

Illustration by Lizzy Stewart for The New York Times.

Illustration by Lizzy Stewart for The NYT.

The event, with workshops on polyamory, sex-therapy interventions and compulsive sexual behavior, sold out to 400 clinicians, with a waiting list.

In March, the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium in Washington, D.C., the largest gathering of therapists in North America, offered nine workshops dealing with sexuality, sexual orientation and gender identity. Five years ago, there were only two.

In traditional couples therapy, which is about 50 years old, sex has often been shoved to the sideline. Practitioners are trained to work on underlying relationship issues, like blame or communication, many discussing sex only if the couple wants to talk about it.

But in the last decade, as coupledom itself has been legally redefined, a chorus of provocative voices in couples therapy has emerged, emphasizing the importance of good sex in relationships and sometimes suggesting the radical idea that couples fix the sex before tackling other issues.

These renegades of couples therapy — such as Suzanne Iasenza, Margie Nichols, Jean Malpas, Marty Klein, Joe Kort, Arlene Lev, Marta Meana and Tammy Nelson — have become popular speakers at conferences like “Sex and Attachment.” They speak on topics like affairs, “gender-queerness,” transsexual identity, kink, BDSM (bondage/discipline, domination/submission, sadism/masochism) and pornography to audiences more accustomed to a language of betrayal and forgiveness.

The den mother of the group is Esther Perel, 56, the internationally known Belgian-born author of “Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence,” who asserts that mystery and distance could benefit long-term monogamy.

Ms. Perel, based in Manhattan, is writing a book tentatively called “Affairs: Cheating in the Age of Transparency,” and gave a TED talk about the topic in March that has been viewed about two million times. Her newest provocation is the idea that trauma-based language around affairs is limiting.

“An affair is an act of betrayal and also an experience of expansion and growth,” Ms. Perel said in an interview. “It is a relational trauma, but it isn’t a crime. The family can often come out of it stronger and more resilient, and often an affair will draw the couple out of a place of deadness.”

Ms. Perel holds occasional individual sessions in which, by request, she will keep secrets from the other partner in couples work. The goal is for both partners to be honest with the therapist, if not (yet) each other. “Because we agree on this in advance,” Ms. Perel said, “if something comes out and it has to do with an affair, I am never in an ethical breach.”

Another emerging voice on infidelity is Dr. Nelson, 52, a New Haven-based couples and sex therapist and author of “The New Monogamy: Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity.” She encourages couples to write their own monogamy rules, which can include extramarital sex on weekends or extramarital sex but only together.

“I describe monogamy as honest, perpetual dependency of some type,” Dr. Nelson said. “It can be whatever a couple wants, but it has to be fluid and flexible, and the couple has to keep renewing it, like a license.”

Dr. Iasenza, 59, a psychotherapist in New York, is known for her expansive approach to gender, sexual orientation and pleasure.

She shows her clients sexual-response models like the Basson model, which contradicts the orgasm-focused, human sexual response cycle developed by Masters & Johnson (excitement, plateau, orgasm, resolution), and which posits that a partner can initiate sex for reasons aside from excitement, and arousal may precede desire. (This may be a mind-blowing idea for women who feel, especially after 10-plus years of marriage, that waiting for desire is like waiting for Godot.)

Dr. Iasenza also schedules private sessions with each partner, taking sexual histories and giving them homework to write sexual “menus” (lists of turn-ons), which they later share with each other.

To understand why sex-forward couples therapists may still be considered renegades in the era of shows like “Girls” and “Transparent,” it may help to know that the concept of couples therapy is only slightly older than the Sexual Revolution. It was pushed to the fore in the early 1960s by Don D. Jackson, Virginia Satir and Jay Haley at the Mental Research Institute in Palo Alto, Calif., and Murray Bowen at Georgetown University Medical Center.

Sex therapy, invented by Masters & Johnson, evolved separately — and neither William Masters nor Virginia Johnson was a couples therapist or mental-health provider. Today, there is only one certification program for sex therapists, the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists, which means aspiring sex therapists may find access to courses and supervisors a challenge.

And though the association requires its certified sex therapists to be licensed social workers or psychologists first, couples therapists are not required to have any training in sex. Ms. Perel, for example, said she received exactly one hour of education on sex in her psychotherapy training, which led her to become certified in sex therapy in 2010, more than two decades later.

Continue reading here.

Danielle Voirin’s Photo of the Day for 10.09.15

Stage director Alexandre Camerlo, during rehearsal of the Offenbach operetta La Chatte Metamorphosée en Femme (The Cat Who Transformed Into A Woman), which will be performed tonight at 59 Rivoli in Paris as a part of their classical music festival "La Classique C'est Pour les Vieux!" (Classical Music is for Old People!).

Stage director Alexandre Camerlo, during rehearsal of the Offenbach operetta La Chatte Metamorphosée en Femme (The Cat Who Transformed Into A Woman), which will be performed tonight at 59 Rivoli in Paris as a part of their classical music festival “La Classique C’est Pour les Vieux!” (Classical Music is for Old People!).

Paris-based photographer Danielle Voirin travels the world and documents her experiences in photographs. She takes street photography and photojournalism a shade beyond even art, to the level of mysticism. You may see more of her work on her website DanielleVoirin.com, or her alt website, DaniVoirin.com.

Without End

Since you are reading this, you know that the world did not end yesterday as some had predicted. That’s good news, but no surprise to astrologers. In case you haven’t noticed, astrology is about cycles rather than ends. The great thing about cycles is that every end is also simultaneously a beginning.

len-wallick-logo

As discussed here a week ago, Venus ends a long two-part stretch in Leo today shortly after 1:29 pm EDT (17:29:06 UTC). By making its second ingress to Virgo this year, however, Venus also implicitly begins “Your Time To Shine.”

Additionally (as Amanda, Fe and Eric all discussed this week), Mercury’s last retrograde of 2015 ends tomorrow, essentially allowing Mercury’s two-plus months in Libra (From Aug. 27 to Nov. 2) a fresh start.

All of which leads to to the grandmother of fresh starts just before 8:06 pm EDT Monday (00:05:40 UTC Tuesday): a New Moon. In this case the Moon will catch up with and symbolically merge with the Sun at 19+ Libra. That will be right after both of the luminaries have have been emblematically recharged by an opposition to galvanizing Uranus, which is on the other side of the zodiac in Aries.

The axis from Libra to Aries implicitly represents relationships, which go through cycles of their own. Hence at least one apparent theme presents itself with the Libra New Moon next week: how to handle those cycles.

The key to handling cycles of relationship is to see that they really are without end. That’s true regardless of whether the relationship in question is between you and another person, you and a group of people, or with life itself. For in every relationship’s end there is either proof or strong evidence of a simultaneous new beginning leading into a new phase of continuity.

It is only attachment to maintaining stasis that makes endings appear to happen. Such attachments are understandable. It’s only human to want good times and good relationships to last forever. Yet, only a small exercise of imagination allows you to see that even the shortest cycles do last forever — because no subsequent cycle will ever be quite the same.

Neither does it take much thought to understand that any cycle brought to a standstill would not be good news at all. Wanting any one moment to last forever is not only impractical, it’s counterproductive. Even the finest moment of your life would lose meaning if there were no other moments to compare it to. It is only by seeing the connection with all others that your connection to any other can be understood and appreciated.

And in that understanding is a through-line that is anything but straight. Rather, all lines in reality inevitably curve. And only through that curving (and the cycles brought forth) is connection made possible.

So it is that with each connection comes a new cycle. With each cycle then comes a renewal. With each renewal, endings instantly become beginnings in a world that is part of a solar system, which in turn is part of a universe — which, in its every part and every expression, never fails to indicate that each and every being, thing or moment (as well as the greater whole) is, in fact, without end. It is, instead, continuously with any and all else.

Offered In Service

Len is available for astrology readings. You can contact him at lenwallick [at] gmail [dot] com.

Danielle Voirin’s Photo of the Day for 10.08.15

Une Parisienne, texting in front of the corner café, on a crisp autumn afternoon.

Une Parisienne, texting in front of the corner café, on a crisp autumn afternoon.

Paris-based photographer Danielle Voirin travels the world and documents her experiences in photographs. She takes street photography and photojournalism a shade beyond even art, to the level of mysticism. You may see more of her work on her website DanielleVoirin.com, or her alt website, DaniVoirin.com.

Turn Around and Emerge With Mercury

You can’t get justice on past wrongs done to you by punishing yourself now with intense self-criticism. Similarly, punishing those close to you now who mimic those who hurt you in your early years won’t help, either. Those strategies only lead to unhelpful things like low self-esteem (or outright self-hatred) and repeating abusive cycles.

There is another way to deal with it all.

Monarch on a butterfly bush in Arrowsic, Maine; I have not seen a Monarch in about two years. Photo by Amanda Painter.

Monarch on a butterfly bush in Arrowsic, Maine; the first Monarch I’ve seen in at least two years. Photo by Amanda Painter.

That way forward and out is suggested by the chart for when Mercury stations direct in the first degree of Libra this Friday, Oct. 9, at 10:57 am EDT (14:57 UTC).

In Libra, we know that issues of relationship and justice are at play. With Mercury involved, we know that how we think about and communicate these ideas (especially with those closest to us) is the focus. Keep your antennae tuned for any new ‘truth’ that emerges Friday.

Also note that the days on either side of the station can feel especially chaotic or scattered, so try to stay focused and take your time with things.

At the moment that Mercury stations, the Moon and Mars are exactly conjunct in Virgo (with Jupiter close by), and opposite Neptune in Pisces. Venus is in the first degree of Virgo exactly opposite the centaur object Nessus; Venus and Nessus are both square Saturn in Sagittarius.

Eric gave a thorough and humane description of this astrology in this week’s Planet Waves FM, so I’m going to recap and riff on some of the ideas he talked about; they really are that important.

One of the things described by the Moon, Mars and Venus all so close together in Virgo is the potential to be especially critical, fussy or stingy — especially toward yourself. Those qualities in the extreme are not healthy for any relationship, including your relationship with yourself. Always picking at your supposed defects wears on your self-esteem; that is, your self-respect.

Continue reading