5 thoughts on “Thanksgiving Survival Tips 2016

  1. Amy Elliott

    I don’t understand why people feel obligated to torture themselves in this way. If this is what happens at Thanksgiving family dinners, why ever go? I’ve not participated in a family Xmas dinner in many years. I don’t really see the point; and if I lived in the US and had family members who were Trump voters, I probably would cut them off.

    1. Amanda Painter

      Well, family ties — and the sense of obligation — can be very strong. But also, I think sometimes people hold out hope that “maybe this year, it will be different.”

      And certainly not all people subject themselves to holiday torture; some manage to break away. Some actually really enjoy the gatherings (or most parts of the gatherings). I think it can be a very complex thing when you love people, but don’t agree with them on issues. Or when you love them, but not everyone has gone to therapy. 🙂

      I’d say the cultural scripts around this holiday and Christmas are quite strong, though perhaps might be loosening a touch, depending on the individual family. But yes: many people cannot deal with the guilt involved in *not* doing the expected holiday thing, and don’t even grasp that there might be a healthier option. Being willing to endure being “ostracized from the tribe,” especially when the tribe leaders are one’s own parents (from whom one has not individualized sufficiently), seems a scary, dangerous thing to many.

      Me? I’m just psyched I’ll get to play with my 11-year-old nephew, my 7-month old nephew, and their 6-year-old twin half-sisters. 🙂

      1. Amy Elliott

        Amanda, you are a shining light of loveliness in a dark and cynical world. I must admit that since the orange horror stole the election, I’ve been grumpy and irritable. I will try to cultivate a better state of mind.

        I remember when my nephew was still a kid. He’s all grown up now, bless him — he’s become an awesome young man, and I get prouder of him all the time. 🙂

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