By Rob Moore

I must tell you I haven’t felt all that connected of late. At least not to the degree that I feel most confident and at ease. I know why. It’s because I haven’t been having sex.

Setting out with the intention of getting it on with someone (or someones) is something I have found to be among my most hallowed ground.

There is just so much going on throughout a sexual experience for all involved.

There is the merging of our energies as well as our physical matter. Emotions, passions, heat, fluids, questions, concerns, hopes, desires and a mutual goal to enjoy the moment to the fullest runs through us all during this incredibly intense and personal event. In consideration of all that, I make my most focused effort at being clear and present as I prepare to enter such connections.

Well, it’s that very exercise that’s gone missing for me of late.

Like my sex life, Mars has pretty much been sitting still in the sky recently from our view here on Earth. Tomorrow Mars officially turns retrograde. In the weekly Planet Waves newsletter that went out Thursday, Eric writes about the influences we will likely notice as Mars moves from apparent station to reverse motion.

Where in your life have you eased off the gas pedal as Mars has slowed toward retrograde the last few weeks? For me, a number of factors has had me taking a break from sex and my usual haunts to reconsider a few priorities. Topping the list has been the quality of my sex connections — which, I must say, is echelons above where it was only a few years ago. That has everything to do with the desire to be fully present today.

From what I can tell, it’s simply part of the human experience to ask, “What next?” once we’ve reached certain plateaus. As gratifying as sexual connections in the moment — and for the moment — tend to be for me, I have been feeling pulled toward these same types of connections with one key difference: that those of us involved allow ourselves to repeat the experience. In my past, that was synonymous with becoming ‘a couple’ and moving in together. Now I want it to be a testament to our satisfaction with who we are individually.

For some, this was accomplished long ago and they called it polyamory. Such has not been my experience, and the basic concept is one I desire to bring to personal fruition. Among the barriers to realizing this goal, however, is a tragic inability for so many people to fully own their sexual experiences.

Shame following sexual engagement continues to be a prevailing condition with us here in 2016. And I continue to be rather baffled by it, too. Especially in regard to my sexual tribe — homosexual men — who frequently and rather proudly advertise their quest for recreational sex. Great by me. Let’s go for it. And give it our all. And call it a day. Period. But how about at least saying “Hi” next time we run into each other?

Strange as it seems, the concept that ‘sex equals marriage in the eyes of the Lord’ appears to have been handed down even to those who do not subscribe to religion at all. Matter of fact, right this instant I’m recalling a friend telling me several years back that he realized this very idea was lurking around in him from somewhere. His hippie parents sure didn’t verbalize anything of the sort to him. Collective consciousness, maybe? If so, kinda scary.

The concept that I am quick to embrace from that dogmatic idea is that those of us who have sex together are indeed joined by the experience. I mean, come on, we just shared something very personal and intimate. That doesn’t happen with everyone. But neither does it mean we need to conjoin physically for the rest of our days. Or ever again, if we’re not both on board with it.

Yet I believe more of us are on board with going there again than we usually admit. It’s that idea that we’ll be ‘a couple’ by the end of the month that halts the proceedings. (Or perhaps the fear that we won’t be a couple, for some.) I’m now proudly advertising I want to experience a breakthrough in this area. And most recently, I’ve felt as though the planet of sex has been hovering right over the top of me asking, “So, where is it you wanna steer this ship next?”

While we’re asking questions, what kind of sexual experiences do you want for yourself? Be honest with yourself here. It’s just you in there, after all. Okay, now, what kind of sexual experience do you think a guardian angel or a higher guide or even God of the Universe wants for you? Not very many years back my honest answers to those two questions would have been radically different. Then I had a profound inner experience.

My personal meditation and reflection practices have always taken a wildly oscillating path. Sure, I’ve been a little off my game lately, but there have been periods when the most I could do was stare into space while clutching my morning coffee. That was what I needed at that time, though, so I let it be okay.

On the other extreme, there have been periods of higher-connection that were almost off the radar. During one such period, upon connecting with what I now consider to be the higher ‘guidance-octaves’ of myself, I was led into a most unexpected state of sexual arousal.

Thinking I had let my thoughts stray off topic, I tried to bring myself back to a higher place only to find — and to be flat out told by my guidance — that I was already in it. This state of ecstasy rose higher and became so intense in heat and passion I found myself physically held against the wall. The whole time my guide, who I was able to visually perceive, was right there in apparent total control of this scene.

This was already a surreal experience for me but it crossed the line into virtually unbelievable as I was brought to full orgasm. Very strongly attuned to audible perception during this period of my life, it was pointed out to me that this connection — which had more than adequately been demonstrated — was all I ever needed to access; particularly when connecting sexually with others; regardless of how off-center the physical nature of the activities.

I had intellectually deduced many years prior that what we consider ‘holiness’ and what is at the center of sex were likely of the same essence. That audible guidance I was getting from (seemingly) out of nowhere I most certainly considered holy. The holiest of holies, actually. Having that holy presence direct me into a sexual experience was all I needed to realize with my whole being there was no separation between the two.

I must tell you, dear reader, that even with such a consciousness-expanding experience, it still took years for me to fully assimilate it and put the idea into practice. And in many ways, Mars retrograde looks to be just the right catalyst at just the right time. Conditions have become such that I’ve slowed things down long enough to really see where I stand with both my sex goals and my higher-connection goals.

In a post several weeks back following an undesirable experience with sexual enhancement herbs, I indicated my increasing understanding that the sexual results I sought centered around being more fully in the moment. I also indicated that I did not feel ready for such a tall order.

Just as Mars began to enter shadow phase, I had an excellent chance to offer myself to an encounter wherein ‘being in the moment’ was the defining factor of the physical outcome. I was filled with gratitude as I found that — without any special effort — I was staying in the moment with all the right organs responding enthusiastically. I came to realize I had been fully ‘in the moment’ during my sexual experiences for some while and just wasn’t giving myself credit.

It almost defies explanation how readily we can sometimes discount our experiences and where we presently stand.

As Mars begins its return over Sagittarius ground this week, is there anywhere you have cut yourself off from a truly inspired answer? Is there anything that has attracted you that has appeared too good to be true? Or just plain not realistic? At minimum, it is a fortuitous time to look again. There is much to suggest that what looked unlikely before may begin to show signs of promise. Who knows… by the time this cycle is complete, you may discover you’ve been ready for some particular something all along.