In this Featured Article from Cosmophilia, Registered Nurse and energy worker Diana Hay explores the difficulties in feeling like she’s bouncing back and forth across realities, reminding us that wisdom lies within. Read the full article here. — Amanda P.
by Diana Hay
While I was deployed to Afghanistan, I was the leader of a small medical team. As a conscientiously spiritual person I vowed to myself that I would lead with integrity and wisdom, that I would follow my internal guidance, and use my heart as my foremost leadership tool.
I did just that while I was deployed. It was a disaster.
The military leadership saw compassion as a weakness and my cooperative leadership as poor leadership. Even though the team members flourished, the leadership would not condone my user-friendly guidance.
There was an investigation. I got sent home early, humiliated, my career shattered. My world began to split down the seams.
My long-time spiritual teacher, Jo Dunning, taught me that not only does everything happen for a reason, but everything comes as a gift for my benefit. I knew with all my heart that I was following my guidance and doing the right thing. Why was I getting kicked out of a life-long career?
My entire soul gave a strong middle-finger salute to God at this point and asked, “What the fuck?!”
I began to ask for help. I never ask for help, but ask I did. I hired a lawyer to champion me. I requested aid from angels, ascended masters and gods of all religions. I prayed, did energy work, used tarot, astrology, magic, oils, candles, mantras, meditation, even banishment spells. The more I asked for help, the worse the situation got.
I remembered that back in 1998 I received an astrological reading from a divinely gifted astrologer named Eric Francis. My chart spoke through him as he interpreted. He said that I was born during an eclipse, which brings a sense of destiny. I realized that part of me already knew that. He also said that I should get out of the military — that I didn’t belong there. I should have listened.
The sensation of no longer belonging kept happening. I remember back when the troubles started in Afghanistan; one particular emergency resuscitation in our trauma bay comes to mind. I was looking at the patient, writhing in pain from bullet wounds as we were sticking needles in him. A mystic calm enveloped me from the barbaric treatment. While in this bubble, I knew there were other choices. My entire being down to my bones knew: there is a better way.